bathroom drama, do third graders know what s-e-x is, and Charlie’s got a broken leg. These are the days of my life.

Well, sometimes I feel like there’ll never be an end to the craziness of my crazy life.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s a crazy beautiful life, but busy and full of surprises.  Mostly good, for sure.

Wednesday was the official groundbreaking for our bathroom addition in the basement.  I’d been kind of fretting about it, because I am the one that cleans the bathroom upstairs.  It’s our only bathroom at the moment.  So, while the contractors work on the basement bathroom, where will they go?  I was starting to get the heebyjeebies about having to clean up a bunch of stranger’s piss on the seat (and floor, if they’re sloppy).  It’s bad enough I have to clean up after dh and ds.  They’re not that messy, but I clean on my hands and knees and it aint pretty.  But the excitement of the groundbreaking was far beyond my anxiety of getting the heebyjeebies.  Until day 2, Thursday, one of the guys came up and asked to use the bathroom.  I said, sure, sure, sure.  Really, like that, because, really, I was thinking No, No, NO.  But then he was in there a while and I was thinking Noooooooooooooo.  I didn’t take into account they’d be doing number twos.  OMG!  My heebyjeeby anxiety alert jumped about ten notches when he came out of the bathroom and asked for some spray.  oh wait!  He didn’t ask for spray, but I was thinking he should’ve.

After some hyperventilating and relaxation techniques, I am fine.  Really.  I’m just happy to be getting a new bathroom.

I keep telling myself that anyway.

Here’s a pic of the framing – the absolute beginning of this project.  I’m thinking it’s going to be 3 or 4 weeks.

Anxiety alert went into full swing again when Charlie got run over by Jake.  I mean, literally.   He broke his arm or something, because he’s limping around like Simon Birch.  I took him to the vet today and for 50.00 he told me to wait out the weekend and if he’s not better by Monday, I’ll have to pay another 100.00 for an x-ray (and that’s not including sedation and another exam fee.  damn, pets cost alotta dinero.)  let me show you again how much bigger Jake is than Charlie:

And then today I volunteered at ds’s school.  First, I re-shelved books in the library and then helped kids open milk cartons in the cafeteria.  If you volunteer just an hour, they give you free lunch.  And who doesn’t love school lunches?  (Me and my affinity for cafeteria food is no good for my desire to join the slow food movement, so I don’t think it’s ever gonna happen.  Or, I could always just keep contradicting myself.)  Anyway, I was sitting with ds as I ate my lunch.  He was next to me and a little girl in his class sat in front of me.  She pointed to a kid on the other side of my ds and said, “he just said something inappropriate.”  My first thought was, ‘isn’t that funny?  They must hear that word often.’ But then I made the mistake of asking her what he said and she replied, “he said S-E-X.”  Ack.  I was shocked.  Completely shocked!!!  My ds is in third grade.  Do these kids even know what s-e-x is?  I was panicking, I froze.  I didn’t know what to say, so I just stared ahead, not looking into anyone’s eyes.  But I could feel their stares, their fears about what I was going to do or say.  Was I mad?  they wanted to know, but I shut down; I mentally covered my ears and sang, “lalalalalalalalalala.”  And when they saw I was paying no attention, they went on with their lunch.  and so did I.  But now, alas: what shall I do?    Is it time for the birds and the bees?  I haven’t prepared.  I have no idea what to do.

umph.  pizza’s ready.  Gotta go….





One response to “bathroom drama, do third graders know what s-e-x is, and Charlie’s got a broken leg. These are the days of my life.

  1. yes, time for birds and bees. he’s gonna be getting lots of incorrect info from others if you don’t set him straight. i remember the things people said in 3rd grade!

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